Okay, so here’s the lowdown on cereal and colors. Let’s take Froot Loops. Same taste that makes your dentist cringe, but depending on where you’re munching it, they’re rocking different shades! In the U.S. — shout out to the land of neon — you get this bright rainbow thanks to all those synthetic dyes (think Red No. 40, Yellow No. 5 kind of deal). Meanwhile, in Canada? They’re going au naturel with colors that sound more like a farmer’s market spread: blueberries, watermelon, and huito — whatever that is, exactly.
See, the folks over at WK Kellogg (you know, that giant who makes your breakfast dreams come true) can totally ditch the fake stuff, but will they? And, more importantly, if they do, will cereal lovers even go for cereals that look like they’ve been washed with beige laundry detergent? Heck, even Robert F. Kennedy Jr. (yes, the dude from the Department of Health and Human Services) is poking the food giants to drop the petroleum-based colorings like, yesterday. He’s like, “We gotta ditch this stuff for the sake of our health!” But the companies, well, they’re kinda slow.
PepsiCo’s catching the vibes, a little. They’re saying they might start phasing out the bright chemicals in drinks, chips, and whatnot, but let’s not hold our breath. Some companies tried going natural before — you know Kraft’s mac and cheese? They successfully went turmeric and paprika for that iconic orange. But, back to Froot Loops and their neon posse, not so fast, buddy.
Critics like Dr. Peter Lurie scream louder than a toddler denied candy: “Gov, just quit hoping companies play nice and actually make ’em stop!” But man, shifting colors isn’t like tossing a dab of buzzfeed in your coffee — it’s more like recalibrating a whole damn factory. Do you know how long it takes to get your red cabbage extract right? Or how much carrot or beet you need for the shade and the headache of adjusting recipe formulas? Light and heat play Cotton Eye Joe with natural colors, fading, changing, or totally disappearing. And storage? Chill your natural colors like fine wine or risk them turning into a questionable science experiment.
The Consumer Brands Association – these are the folks speaking through press releases – say they’re delivering safe, tasty stuff. But safe doesn’t always mean best when it comes to artificial dyes, especially with studies wagging fingers at potential kiddie hyperactivity.
Some states are like “Nah” to fake colors (west coast and the rest, looking at you, too), and there’s this whole other world of growing beets and pulping up some natural colors. Though, at the end of it, nobody wants a carrot-flavored cereal, alright? It’s about balancing color and taste, about giving folks the loops and hoops they crave sans the neon ’80s disco ball vibes.
It’s ongoing, it’s messy, and it’s all happening while coffee cools too fast and emails stack quicker than laundry piles. Will our pop-tarts return less technicolor and more “toned down”? Can brands gauge just how beige fans will tolerate in exchange for “healthier” choices? I’m staring down my cereal box with one eyebrow up.
