Jordan Grumet, who has transitioned from being a hospice doctor to a financial independence author and podcaster, has been on my radar for quite some time now. About a year and a half ago, I had the chance to review his book, "Taking Stock." In that book, Grumet wove in insights from his experiences with patients nearing the end of life, urging readers to take control of their lives and prioritize mindful spending.
The response to that review was tremendous, with many readers resonating deeply with the message. It seems these issues strike a chord for many on their journey toward financial independence. While the book was a hit for certain readers, it also stirred deep emotions in others. Now, Grumet is back with a new book titled "The Purpose Code," set to hit the shelves tomorrow, January 7th.
Grumet starts "The Purpose Code" by addressing a common feedback from readers, which he terms as “purpose anxiety.” There’s a particularly striking quote reflecting this: “I’m so sick of people telling me to find my purpose. I don’t know my purpose and it’s stressing me out.”
In this latest book, Grumet lays out the advantages of living life with intention and offers guidance on how to achieve it. Below are some of the key insights I gathered.
Differentiating Purpose and Meaning
Happiness, purpose, and meaning are often spoken of in vague terms, making it difficult to articulate what exactly we’re striving for. Grumet sorts out these concepts, clarifying that each has distinct characteristics and they should be understood and addressed individually.
He defines meaning as a backward-looking understanding of our past, a cognitive interpretation of our life experiences. It’s not the specific events that shape our happiness, but the narratives we construct around them. For those who feel victimized by past hardships, unhappiness may follow. However, those who see obstacles as stepping stones often find greater happiness. Psychotherapy often emphasizes this reframing to create meaning.
Purpose, on the other hand, is more action-oriented, with a focus on the present and future. This standpoint is central to "The Purpose Code."
Grumet suggests happiness largely stems from a life filled with meaning, purpose, and connections with others.
Creating “Little P Purpose”
A standout concept in the book is Grumet’s distinction between “Little P” and “Big P” purposes. Generally, when we think of purpose, the grand “Big P” purpose comes to mind. It’s the kind of life mission that attempts space exploration, cures cancer, or tackles global warming. Not having such grand aspirations might feel like a lack of purpose.
These “Big P” purposes can indeed change the world. But they are seldom fulfilled, often leading to anxiety among those pursuing these immense goals, or making others feel inadequate for not having such a purpose.
Grumet contends that pursuing a “Big P” purpose isn’t the only way. Instead, he champions the pursuit of “Little P” purposes, which are characterized by personal satisfaction rather than global impact, having multiple small purposes rather than a singular life-defining one, and being enjoyable and achievable.
Instead of being goal-dependent, “Little P” purposes appreciate incremental change, leading to health and longevity benefits.
This seems much more realistic, doesn’t it? But how do we introduce this into our lives? Grumet suggests undertaking “The Climb.”
“The Climb”
To discover and foster your “Little P” purpose, Grumet introduces “The Climb.” The journey begins by freeing up time in your life, removing current activities that don’t deserve your time and attention, and gradually adding purposeful activities. While it might sound simple in theory, execution can be challenging. That’s why Grumet offers a guiding framework.
Activities, particularly in the beginning, should not hinge on financial gains. They should be "goal agnostic," meaning the joy should be in the activity itself, with no room for failure.
You’ll need to be open to exploration, trying different things until you discover what truly resonates with you. As you pursue activities that ignite your passion, creating meaningful connections with others becomes simpler.
The Role of Others
Grumet delves into research in "The Purpose Code," showing that the positive effects of community align closely with those of purpose. This interplay is encapsulated nicely in this quote from the book: “When we intentionally engage in deeply meaningful activities, we find people with the same calling. We bond to those people through shared goals and interests. These people become our community.” He calls these groups “communities of internal purpose.”
The insights prompted me to revisit a piece I wrote long ago about choosing a place for retirement, emphasizing the importance of living near beloved activities to build community, contrasting with the traditional advice focused on financial factors like cost of living.
Just like Grumet, my beginnings were in healthcare. I resonated with his feelings of disconnection and lack of fulfillment in that sector. Like him, I discovered a sense of community and purpose in my role as a financial blogger, writer, and planner, a path I embraced despite a reduced income and time spent compared to my previous career.
Grumet’s analysis on distinguishing meaningful engagement from making others your sole purpose was particularly insightful, exemplified through the “Myth of Joyful Parenting.”
Though “Little P” purposes might seem self-serving, Grumet argues they have transformative potential, not just for ourselves but for the world around us.
Many people define themselves through roles like parent, spouse, or their job. When these roles shift, purpose can feel distant.
Regret vs. Disappointment
The book’s final chapter discusses channeling regret towards purposeful pursuit. Having written on regret before, I appreciated Grumet’s insights, informed by his hospice experience.
He distinguishes regret from disappointment, stating that disappointment feels immutable. At life’s end, what people often express aren’t regrets but disappointments.
Regret, by contrast, involves agency. It is a narrative we can address, provided we’re willing to face truths and take action.
Consider trying a long-desired activity, visiting a dream destination, starting that business, making amends with someone, or reconnecting with a lost contact.
Grumet challenges the typical excuses of lacking time or money, providing evidence they’re often myths. The real reasons we hold back are because actions can sometimes be daunting.
This sentiment aligns with my observations of retirees who confront a purpose and meaning crisis when they finally have an abundance of free time.
Should You Read The Purpose Code?
Readers here often seek answers to whether they can retire, initially approaching it as a financial puzzle. Yet deeper questions lurk beyond the math. As people find themselves with more time, especially in retirement, a quest for purpose and meaning often emerges.
"The Purpose Code" offers a nuanced perspective. Grumet rationalizes why activities that seem self-indulgent could unlock purpose. He meticulously differentiates building connections through meaningful work from centering your entire purpose on others. Acknowledging everyone faces distinct, sometimes daunting obstacles, he encourages shedding a victim mindset and confronting regrets before they become irrevocable disappointments.
For those facing a purpose and meaning crisis, "The Purpose Code" might just be what’s needed. I advise delving into these themes before they escalate.
Win a Copy of The Purpose Code
Release day is tomorrow, and you have a chance to win a free copy! Just leave a comment by midnight tonight, Monday, January 6th. The winner will be emailed tomorrow morning, January 7th.
Valuable Resources
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Chris Mamula is a rare combination of financial wisdom and passionate self-education, having retired from a physical therapist role at 41. Early unsatisfactory encounters with the financial industry compelled him to steep himself in investing and tax strategies. Upon achieving financial independence, Chris began sharing his insights on wealth accumulation, DIY investing, fiscal planning, early retirement, and lifestyle innovation at Can I Retire Yet? He is the principal author of "Choose FI: Your Blueprint to Financial Independence." As a financial planner with Abundo Wealth, Chris extends financial planning, aiming to make high-quality advice accessible to previously underserved populations.
Chris’s expertise has been featured across major platforms like MarketWatch, Morningstar, U.S. News & World Report, and Business Insider. Furthermore, he’s delivered presentations at significant gatherings, including those held by Bogleheads and the American Institute of Certified Public Accountants. For blog-related inquiries, contact Chris at [email protected]. For financial planning inquiries, reach out to [email protected].
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