Over the years, research has gradually chipped away at some of our most cherished beliefs about what makes humans unique. It turns out that traits like theory of mind, empathy, and a sense of time are not exclusive to us; many animals share these capacities.
However, there is one trait that remains distinctly human. Usually, animals — when they’re not under human capture or influenced by bizarre parasites — act primarily in their own best interests. Why does a frog jump in a certain way, or a hummingbird hover meticulously? The reason tends to be predictable: it’s all about ensuring their survival and gene propagation.
Humans, on the other hand, tend to self-sabotage. Imagine if David Attenborough were narrating a human life: he might find it perplexing when observing people smoking, indulging in junk food, or staggering into lamp-posts while drunk. These behaviors don’t align neatly with evolutionary logic. Gamblers, thrill-seekers, and those who overeat or use drugs often persist in actions despite knowing they’re detrimental.
Although this self-sabotaging behavior affects a smaller portion of the population, when such tendencies expand, they can morph into significant crises. But what if this kind of self-destructive behavior became a global phenomenon? What if everyone started behaving against their self-interests all at once?
That’s pretty much where we find ourselves right now. There’s growing evidence that a particularly harmful habit is taking root. Derek Thompson from The Atlantic mentioned this earlier: people are spending an increasing amount of time alone. This trend is growing in the Western world, and the consequences are alarming—studies are increasingly correlating isolation with worsening mental health issues, especially among younger people.
So, why are we choosing this solitary route? The decline in face-to-face interactions seems to parallel the rise of personal entertainment devices and smartphones. It seems many prefer television or social media to mingling with others. But do we really? We know we feel better after socializing yet worse after time spent online. Evolutionary psychologists often relate our activities to our “wiring” as social beings, tied to our history of collective survival. It’s odd, then, that our deep-rooted instincts aren’t correcting this.
It seems that being alone might reinforce itself in a vicious cycle. The more time we indulge in solitude, the more our social skills tend to degrade, making time spent with others feel less fulfilling. Research involving polar explorers in Antarctica, who lived in isolation for months, found measurable brain shrinkage. The intense need for connection can lead you into what scientists call the “loneliness loop.” Low self-esteem, hostility, stress, pessimism, and social anxiety can exacerbate this, driving the individual further into isolation.
Isolation might also be driven by what’s known in economics as “collective traps.” Let’s say you prefer in-person interactions, but your friends favor staying in touch via social media. You might reluctantly join them online. Or perhaps you enjoy the buzz of office life, but most colleagues work remotely, leaving you facing empty desks if you commute in.
If a significant number of people choose solitary lifestyles, new social norms might evolve. I’ve noted before that the value placed on having many real-world friends seems to be waning, especially among the younger generation. Where once a Saturday night spent alone was the pinnacle of uncool, peer pressure urging youngsters out has diminished. Nowadays, young people often embrace introversion and share social anxieties online, finding reassurance in communities that accept plan-canceling as the norm. This fosters more solitude, but tracing back the root cause might lead us to what all self-sabotaging behaviors have in common: addiction. Our relationship with mobile phones mirrors this, akin to dependency issues like smoking or gambling.
Phones keep us endlessly scrolling, employing tactics reminiscent of casinos that hook us to slot machines. Social media transforms the social experience into a competition, offering likes, followers, and dopamine-triggering rewards.
We seem to amass social clout, made all the more addictive because it’s quantified—displayed as likes and followers. The needs for status, recognition, and inclusion that once prompted us to socialize in person have been refashioned into a digital game we can’t resist.
Despite some policymakers hesitating to label excessive phone use as “addiction,” citing the risk of over-pathologizing a widespread behavior, evidence says otherwise. A study encompassing over two million people across 64 countries suggests a quarter of them experience “smartphone addiction.” Research shows social media profoundly stimulates brain reward centers and triggers pathways associated with compulsive behavior.
Should we start framing our phone-induced isolation as an addiction? It might guide us toward real solutions. In Britain, policies to curb cravings—like taxes and bans on cigarettes, sugar, and junk food—have proved popular and effective. Phones present a unique challenge though, being essential to modern life. Yet, if people aim to cut down on social media, maybe it’s time to think about providing support to do just that.
Martha Gill is an Observer columnist. If this inspires any thoughts, feel free to send a brief letter to [email protected] for publication consideration.
