Hey editor dude, so here’s my two cents about this new Oscar thingy for stunts that’s supposed to make its grand premiere in 2028 or whenever. Seriously, Academy folks, is this what y’all came up with after brainstorming over fancy lattes or whatever you sip on those shiny Hollywood tables? Like, where’s the applause for those legendary daredevils who practically invented “heart attack in a cinema seat”? They’re not just footnotes in ancient history books, folks.
And now, guess what, most of the so-called “stunts” in movies are just some geek on a computer clicking stuff. CGI magic! Are we awarding that? First off, mad props to those geniuses animating the latest wild car chase or explosion but c’mon, it’s like giving a prize for the best typewriter font in silent films again.
So, what’s gonna happen at the Oscars? Are we supposed to clap for like an illustrator designing “dangerous” flips and falls without breaking a sweat? Sherlocking over if this is a nostalgic pat on the back or just plain absurdity. Anyway, time travels backward – if only! – so those breathtaking visual daredevils of yester-decades could take a bow. Peace out, Academy. Make it worth the popcorn.
Yours chaotically,
Ben Herndon, Los Angeles
